Cafeoutdoors.com: Something to think about

Rand Paul had a good suggestion for the press last week: Why don't you hacks start asking Democrats the same kind of loaded, gotcha, when-did-you-stop-beating-your-wife questions that you always throw at Republicans?

Will never happen, of course -- too many invitations to too many Beautiful People cork parties are at stake. But suppose the press were equal opportunity bashers?

For example, what if Hillary Clinton had to answer some real questions when she officially begins her campaign for president, er, queen? It's easy to slant any question, even if it's totally legit.

For instance, Hillary was against gay marriage less than two years ago. So blogger Jon Gabriel suggested this question for her: "What finally made you agree with **** Cheney that gay marriage should be legalized?"

Believe me, if Savannah Guthrie or her producer can think up stuff like this, then absolutely anybody can do it: "Mrs. Clinton, your husband signed both the Defense of Marriage Act in 1996 and the federal RFRA (sponsored by Ted Kennedy in the Senate) in 1993. Does that make your husband a bigot?"

When Bill Clinton is your spouse, the possibilities are endless. "Madame Secretary, as governor, your husband signed a bill into law making English the official language of Arkansas. Does he still hate Hispanics, and do you share his xenophobia?"

It always looks more legit if you can blame your hostile questions on somebody else, say, the author of a new book.
"Your daughter Chelsea is quoted in a new book called 'The Residence' by Karen Andersen Brower as telling the White House staff that you referred to your Secret Service 'pigs.' Is that true?"

Once you find yourself a good club, keep pummeling!
"Mrs. Clinton, that same just-published book also quotes your staffers as saying you once bloodied the president with a book. This contradicts earlier reports that you preferred ashtrays or lamps when assaulting Bill. So what is your weapon of choice these days in domestic abuse?"

Make sure the authors' bona fides are in order, so Hillary can't claim it's just another "vast right-wing conspiracy."
"Madame Secretary, in their book 'Game Change,' noted left-wing Kool-Aid drinkers John Heilemann and Mark Halperin write that your husband, when talking to Ted Kennedy, said of Barack Obama: 'A few years ago, this guy would have been getting us coffee.' What do you think Mr. Clinton meant by that?"

I wasn't in Des Moines afternoon, so I offer these questions up to any network types who wish to use them:
"Mrs. Clinton, can you define 'dead broke' for us?"

"You've talked about how much you love your grandchild. Would you allow your husband's dear friend, convicted pedophile Jeffrey Epstein, to babysit little Charlotte?"

"Do you plan to make speeches in black dialect the way you did in 2008?"

"Mrs. Clinton, can you take us back to when you were dodging sniper fire in Tuzla?

Do you suffer PTSD because of your combat experience in Bosnia?"

"It's generally known that the late ambassador to Libya, Chris Stevens, was gay. Doesn't that make his murder in Benghazi a hate crime, and if not, exactly how many murders of Americans does it take before it 'matters,' as you would say?"

"Do you know what the meaning of the word is, is?"

Are we going too far back? No!!! They're banging Scott Walker for dropping out of college, and Mitt and Juan Ellis Bush are attacked on their prep-school days. Jeb intimidated kids, you know, because he was "tall." So go for it, scribes.

"Hillary, you've said that in 1975 you visited a Marine Corps recruiting station in Arkansas and inquired about enlisting. Can you give us the name of the jarhead you spoke to? We'd like to do a human-interest story on him. Semper fi!"

"Can you explain to us again how it is that you were named after Sir Edmund Hillary, the first man to scale Mount Everest, when you were born in 1947, and nobody had ever heard of him until his climb in 1953?"

"Given your understandable outrage over the war on women and anti-gay discrimination, how can you allow your foundation to accept millions of dollars from the government of Saudi Arabia, which forbids women to drive and recently sentenced a gay man to 450 lashes?"

"Should Medicaid and Medicare pay for sex-change operations?"

One last question for Hillary:
"Since you flunked the bar exam the first time you took it, do you feel a special bond with ex-Gov. Deval Patrick, since it took him three times to pass after he graduated from a prestigious Ivy League school like yours?"
Nah, too local. Let's save that one for when she comes to New Hampshire.

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Thought for the day; “It’s impossible to think outside of the box when all you do is think about getting inside of the box.”