SwampFox
(member)
07/24/07 04:32 PM
Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged

A guy calls a company and orders their 5 day 10lb weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there standing before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company. The Sign reads: "If you can catch me, you can have me."

Without a second thought he takes off after her. After a few miles later huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.

The same girl shows up for the next 4 days and the same thing happens.

On the 5th day he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10lb, as promised.

He calls the company and orders the 5 day 20lb program.

The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning, beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life, She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign round her neck that reads, "If you catch me, you can have me."

Well he's out the door like a shot!

This girl is in excellent shape and it takes him a while to catch her; but when he does, it's definitely worth every muscle cramp and wheeze, so for the next 4 days the same thing happens.

Much to his delight, on the 5th day he weighs himself again only to discover he has lost another 20lb. As promised.

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7day 50lb program.

"Are you sure?" asks the rep on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program."

"Absolutely," he replies," I haven't felt this good in years."

The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds this huge, muscular, 7ft black man standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign that reads: " I'm Nigel. If I catch you, you're mine..."



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