Acts 2:38

An elderly woman had just returned to her home from an evening of Church services when an intruder startled her.

She caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled, "Stop! Acts 2:38!" (Repent, and let every one of you be baptised in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit)

The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done.

As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar, "Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture at you."

"Scripture?" replied the burglar. "She said she had an Axe and Two 38's!"