Little Johnny walks into his primary school classroom one morning to be confronted by his teacher.

Teacher "Ahh, Good Morning Johnny, and just where were you yesterday?"

Johnny "I'm sorry Miss, but my Grandad got burnt yesterday."

Immediately contrite the teacher said, "Oh I am so sorry Johnny! Was he burned very bad?"

Johnny, "Hell yes Mam, they don't f*ck around at these crematoriums you know."