An old married couple was havin breakfast one morning when the old man suddenly exclaimed, "Martha! You remember when we used to have sex any time, any place?" Martha replied, "I sure do Sam, but that was 40 years ago. Do you think we oughta try one more time?"

Sam agreed, so they stipped down naked right at the kitchen table, where Martha quickly exclaimed, "Dammit Sam, you still make my nipples burn like they're on fire." Sam looked at his wife and said, " That's because your left nipple is in the oatmeal, and the right one's in your coffee."