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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #184122 - 04/24/09 08:07 PM

Unicorns and Candy Mountain

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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #184318 - 04/27/09 03:17 AM

One morning, members of a city street department crew reached their job site and realized they had forgotten their shovels.
The crews foreman radioed the office and told his supervisor the situation.
"Don't worry," the supervisor radioed back.
"We'll send shovels. Just lean on each other until they arrive."

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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #184496 - 04/29/09 03:59 AM



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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #184661 - 05/01/09 03:35 AM



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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #184912 - 05/05/09 03:49 AM

KFC's new Swine Flu Dipping Sauce...



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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #185200 - 05/08/09 04:47 AM



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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #185284 - 05/09/09 10:17 AM



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"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #185298 - 05/10/09 04:27 PM



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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #185684 - 05/15/09 11:13 PM

2007 - Chinese year of the Chicken - Bird Flu Pandemic devastates parts of Asia

* 2008 - Chinese year of the Horse - Equine Influenza decimates Australian racing
* 2009 - Chinese year of the Pig - Swine Flu Pandemic kills hundreds of pigs/humans around the globe



It gets worse........

Next year......

*

*

*

2010 - Chinese year of the cork - what could possibly go wrong?

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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #185685 - 05/16/09 12:51 AM

Cork Flu?

I don't get it.


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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: 67Firebird]
      #185705 - 05/16/09 03:00 PM

The word filter changed the c to an r.

As in "cork sucker."

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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #185843 - 05/19/09 03:59 AM



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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #185933 - 05/20/09 04:00 AM



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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #186010 - 05/20/09 09:24 PM

Oh my.

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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: Bubba]
      #186182 - 05/24/09 03:57 PM

In bygone days, a thin man insulted a heavyset man. The heavyset man challenged his tormentor to a duel with pistols.

On the day of the duel, a debate ensued about the unfair advantage held by the thin man because he was a much smaller target. Finally the thin man came up with a solution.

"Let the outline of my figure be chalked upon your body," he said to his opponent, "and any shots of mine that hit outside the chalk lines, we won't count."

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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #186186 - 05/24/09 04:01 PM

"Marine biology researchers have developed a new method to fend off shark attacks. If you are diving and are approached by a shark they recommend that you swim towards it aggressively and punch it on the nose as hard as possible."

"If this doesn't work, beat the shark with your stump."

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #186191 - 05/24/09 04:09 PM

How deranged are we?

90 people get the Swine Flu and everybody wants to wear a mask.
Millions of people have AIDS and no one wants to wear a condom.

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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #186243 - 05/25/09 07:17 PM

Did you hear the one about the graduate student that falied genetic engineering?



His homework ate his dog.

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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #187067 - 06/11/09 04:02 AM



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"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #187952 - 06/27/09 02:57 PM



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"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #188731 - 07/14/09 03:19 AM



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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #189036 - 07/18/09 07:34 PM

Maybe a video for the seriously deranged.

The Power Of Beer

Edited by SwampFox (07/18/09 07:39 PM)


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67Firebird
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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: SwampFox]
      #189522 - 07/28/09 10:04 PM

While walking through Golden Gate Park in San Francisco, a man came upon another man hugging a tree with his ear firmly against the tree. Seeing this he inquired, "Just out of curiosity, what the heck are you doing?"

"I'm listening to the music of the tree," the other man replied.

"You've gotta be kiddin' me."

"No, would you like to give it a try?"

His curiousity piqued, the man says, "Well, OK..." So he wrapped his arms around the tree & pressed his ear up against it. With this, the other guy slapped a pair of handcuffs on him, took his wallet, jewelry, car keys, then stripped him naked and left.

Two hours later another nature lover strolled by, saw this guy handcuffed to the tree stark naked, and asked, "What the heck happened to you?"

He told the guy the whole terrible story about how he got there. When he finished telling his story, the other guy shook his head in sympathy, walked around behind him, kissed him gently behind the ear and said, "This just ain't gonna be your day, cupcake."


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Mel
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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: 67Firebird]
      #189573 - 07/29/09 09:37 PM

That might "strangely arouse" Bubba someway.

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Re: Jokes For The Seriously Deranged [Re: Mel]
      #189578 - 07/30/09 03:41 AM

Now you're scaring me...



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