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SwampFoxModerator
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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261512 - 04/06/20 10:08 AM

Tomorrow is National Home School Tornado Drill Day.
Your kids have to lock themselves in the basement
till you give the all clear.

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SwampFoxModerator
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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261513 - 04/06/20 10:11 AM

Singles Ad: Man with TP looking for woman with sanitizer for good clean fun.

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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261514 - 04/06/20 10:17 AM

After a couple of weeks of quarantine I saw a neighbor walking past the house.
I ran to the window and started yelling at them.
Now I know how my dog feels.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261515 - 04/06/20 10:18 AM

People are so afraid right now
you could rob a bank with a booger.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261516 - 04/06/20 10:20 AM

Homeschooling update: My child just requested a different teacher for next year.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261517 - 04/06/20 10:21 AM

My scale this morning:
Please social distance.
Only weigh one person
at a time.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261518 - 04/06/20 10:22 AM

I will continue
social distancing from
some of you
after this is over.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261519 - 04/06/20 10:23 AM

Empty airports mean CNN lost 99% of their viewers.

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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261520 - 04/06/20 10:41 AM

Every country has the coronavirus but China
got it right off the bat.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261521 - 04/06/20 10:43 AM

Does anyone know if we can start taking showers again?
Or do we just keep washing our hands?

--------------------
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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261522 - 04/06/20 10:44 AM

Our internet connection is so slow
that we turned on the churches live feed
and saw John The Baptist.

--------------------
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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261523 - 04/06/20 10:45 AM

The first reported case of looting was by
Chuck and Nancy.

--------------------
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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261524 - 04/06/20 10:46 AM

In an isolationship.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261525 - 04/06/20 10:49 AM

Gas cheapest it's been in 30 years.
Can't drive.
Airline tickets dirt cheap.
Can't fly.
We are stuck in an Alanis Morisette song.

--------------------
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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261526 - 04/06/20 10:49 AM

I finished Netflix today.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261527 - 04/06/20 10:52 AM

I told my wife I was thankful I had
someone I liked to be quarantined with.
She said,"Must be nice."

--------------------
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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261528 - 04/06/20 10:53 AM

Not a single zombie.
This apocalypses sucks.

--------------------
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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261529 - 04/06/20 10:56 AM

Homeschooling question:
Does having your kids make cork
count as a chemistry lesson?

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"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261530 - 04/06/20 10:57 AM

Germany is now advising people to stock up on cheese and sausages.
This is called the Wurst Käse scenario.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261531 - 04/06/20 10:58 AM

If the food runs out we still have each other.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261532 - 04/06/20 11:01 AM

If it all goes sideways remember that impalements at the gate make for more gracious guest.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261533 - 04/06/20 11:02 AM

My house got TP'd last night.
Now it's worth $875.500.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261534 - 04/06/20 11:04 AM

I wonder how many social drinkers are beginning to sense they have a problem?

--------------------
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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261535 - 04/06/20 11:07 AM

There should be a decrease in home invasions.
Everyone has guns and enough bleach
and paper towels to clean up the evidence.

--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."


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Re: Virus' are us. [Re: SwampFox]
      #261541 - 04/06/20 11:21 AM

PSA: DUI Checkpoint - Corner of Hallway & Kitchen.

--------------------
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