SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Bubba's getting starngely arroused... 
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Video: George Takei PSA
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
Ozark
member
Reged: 12/14/05
Posts: 4012
Loc: out in the woods
|
|
Mr. Sulu is gay? Awww, man!
I'm embarrassed for him after watching that video. Japanese people are dignified and they have a lot of pride. I bet Takei has some "honorable ancestors" who'd a chopped his head off with a sword for acting like that - the little dipchit.
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
No doubt.
They would probably go for the Deat Of A Thousand Cuts for this...
Star Trek star George Takei marries
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
Edited by SwampFox (06/29/08 12:24 PM)
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Siamese twins walk into a pub in Ontario and park themselves on a bar stool. One of them says to the Bar tender, 'Don't mind us, were joined at the hip. I'm John, he's Jim. Two Molson Canadian beers, draft please'.
The bartender, feeling slightly awkward, tries to make polite conversation while pouring the beers. 'Been on holiday yet, lads?'
'Off to England next month,' says John. 'We go to England every year and hire a car and drive for miles, don't we, Jim?' Jim agrees.
'Ah, England!' says the Bar tender. 'Wonderful country... the history, the beer, the culture...'
'Nah, we don't like that British stuff,' says John. ' Hamburgers & Molsons beer, that's us, eh Jim? And we can't stand the English - ..'
'So why keep going to England ?' asks the Bar tender.
'It's the only chance Jim gets to drive.'
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
In a recent survey, people from Detroit have proved to be the most likely to have had sex in the shower!
In the survey, carried out for leading toiletries firm 'Brut', a huge 86% of Detroit residents said that they have enjoyed sex in the shower.
The other 14% said they hadn't been to prison ....
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
67Firebird
Former political advocate
Reged: 12/14/05
Posts: 9172
Loc: Russellville, Mo
|
|
Quote:
SwampFox said:
Fixed, because the Spelling Nazi in me couldn't stand it anymore. 
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
After dying in a car crash, three friends go to heaven for orientation.
They are all asked the same question. "When you are in your casket, and friends and family are mourning over you, What would you like to hear them say about you?"
The first guy immediately responds, "I would like to hear them say that I was one of the great doctors of my time, and a great family man."
The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher who made a huge difference in the children of tomorrow."
The last guy thinks a minute and replies, "I guess I'd like to hear them say, "Look, he's moving!"
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Siamese twins walk into a bar in Texas and park themselves on a bar stool. One of them says to the bartender,
"Don't mind us, we're joined at the hip. I'm John, he's Jim. Two Lonestar beers, draft please."
The bartender, feeling slightly awkward, tries to make polite conversation while pouring the beers and says,
"Been on vaction yet, boys?"
"Off to England next month," says John. "We go to England every year, rent a car and drive for miles, don't we, Jim?"
Jim agrees.
"Ah, England!", says the bartender. "Wonderful country... the history, the beer, the culture..."
"Nah, we don't like any of that British crap!" says John.
"Bar BQ & Lonestar beer, that's us, right Jim? And we can't stand the English - they're so arrogant and rude."
"So why keep going to England?", asks the bartender.
"It's the only chance Jim gets to drive."
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
DjF
little buddie
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 5410
Loc: staring at an empty mailbox...
|
|
Quote:
SwampFox said:
Siamese twins walk into a bar in Texas and park themselves on a bar stool. One of them says to the bartender,
"Don't mind us, we're joined at the hip. I'm John, he's Jim. Two Lonestar beers, draft please."
The bartender, feeling slightly awkward, tries to make polite conversation while pouring the beers and says,
"Been on vaction yet, boys?"
"Off to England next month," says John. "We go to England every year, rent a car and drive for miles, don't we, Jim?"
Jim agrees.
"Ah, England!", says the bartender. "Wonderful country... the history, the beer, the culture..."
"Nah, we don't like any of that British crap!" says John.
"Bar BQ & Lonestar beer, that's us, right Jim? And we can't stand the English - they're so arrogant and rude."
"So why keep going to England?", asks the bartender.
"It's the only chance Jim gets to drive."
it was funnier on 6/29... 
--------------------
somewhere between "Hi, how can we help you?" and "Get off my lawn!"
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Hater...
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
The telephone lineman had been out drinking the night before, and the next day he went to work not feeling too good.
He climbed to the top of the first pole and as he took his pliers out to repair the wire he dropped them. He had to climb all the way down to retrieve them. As he got to the bottom of the pole and was picking up his pliers, a small boy who was standing there said "My daddy is a lineman too and he would have had two pair of pliers, so he wouldn't have to climb down the pole if he dropped one of them".
The lineman tied to ignore the boy and climbed back up the pole very slowly. About his time he needed a hammer to drive in a large nail. As he was taking it out, it slipped and fell to the ground. Again he had to climb down the pole to retrieve it. So he slowly climbed down the pole and sure enough the little boy was still standing there. He said, "My daddy is a lineman too and he would have carried two hammers so if he had lost one he wouldn't have to climb down".
This irritated the lineman, but he ignored the boy and climbed back up the pole to finish his work. He was no sooner up the pole when he had to go to the bathroom, so down he climbs from the pole and goes over to the bushes to take a leak.
As he was relieving himself he saw the little boy watching him through the bushes. He'd had it with this kid so he says to him, "I'll bet your dad doesn't have two of these, does he?"
The boy replied, "No, but his would make two of yours".
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Video: Gift for the guy that has everything...
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Two aliens landed in the Arizona desert near a gas station that was closed for the night. They approached one of the gas pumps and the younger alien addressed it saying, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Take us to your leader.'
The gas pump, of course, didn't respond.
The younger alien became angry at the lack of response.
The older alien said, 'I'd calm down if I were you.'
The younger alien ignored the warning and repeated his greeting. Again, there was no response.
Annoyed by what he perceived to be the pump's haughty attitude, he drew his ray gun and said impatiently, 'Greetings, Earthling. We come in peace. Do not ignore us this way! Take us to your leader or I will fire!'
The older alien again warned his comrade saying, 'You probably don't want to do that! I really don't think you should make him mad.'
'Rubbish,' replied the cocky, young alien. He aimed his weapon at the pump and opened fire. There was a huge explosion. A massive fireball roared towards them and blew the younger alien off his feet and deposited him a burnt, smoking mess about 200 yards away in a cactus patch.
Half an hour passed. When he finally regained consciousness, he refocused his three eyes, straightened his bent antenna, and looked dazedly at the older, wiser alien who was standing over him shaking his big, green head.
'What a ferocious creature!', exclaimed the young fried alien. 'He damn near killed me! How did you know he was so dangerous?'
The older alien leaned over, placed a friendly feeler on his crispy friend and replied, 'If there's one thing I've learned during my intergalactic travels, you don't want to mess with a guy who can loop his penis over his shoulder twice and then stick it in his ear.
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Man goes to his local clinic for his annual medical checkup with the resident nurse.
Nurse: "Sir, I think you should stop masturbating"
Patient: "Why?"
Nurse: "Because I am trying to examine you!!!"
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
Bubba
strangesly aroused
Reged: 12/14/05
Posts: 3828
Loc: Lemmingstan
|
|
you are a sick man!
--------------------
God Bless our Troops!
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Thank you. 
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
67Firebird
Former political advocate
Reged: 12/14/05
Posts: 9172
Loc: Russellville, Mo
|
|
Should children witness Childbirth?
Due to a power outage, only one paramedic responded to the call.
The house was very dark so the paramedic asked Kathleen, a 3-yr old girl, to hold a flashlight high over her mommy so he could see while he helped deliver the baby.
Very diligently, Kathleen did as she was asked. Heidi pushed and pushed and after a little while, Connor was born. The paramedic lifted him by his little feet and spanked him on his bottom.
Connor began to cry.
The paramedic then thanked Kathleen for her help and asked the wide-eyed 3-yr old what she thought about what she had just witnessed. Kathleen quickly responded, 'He shouldn't have crawled in there in the first place......smack his ass again!'
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Boys At The Brothel!
Two eight-year-old boys played in a vacant lot everyday, and across the street was a brothel.
Day after day they saw men go up, knock on the door, go in, and eventually come out happy and smiling. One day they became curious and decided to see what was going on.
The madam answers the door and looks down at the boys, and asks what they want. They explain what they saw, and tell her that they are curious as to what goes on inside.
The Madam thinks for a moment, shrugs, and says, "Do you have 5 dollars?"
Both boys dig deep into their pockets and come up with a total of 50 cents.
She says, "OK, that will have to do," as she proceeds to lift her skirt and pull down her panties. She tells both boys to take a sniff, which they do. She closes the door and the kids proceed home.
About halfway down the block one boy turns to the other and says, "Ya know Joey, I don't think I coulda stood 5 dollars worth of that."
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
Video: Mohamed Brand Condoms
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
SwampFox
member
Reged: 12/13/05
Posts: 7970
Loc: Mid Mo
|
|
The Great Depression
3 generations of prostitutes were talking and the granddaughter says, "I get 100 bucks for a blow job."
"A hundred bucks," the mother cried, "back in my day I was happier then hell with 20."
The old granny said,"Sh*t I was working during the great depression and I was just happy to get a hot meal."
--------------------
"Being deeply learned and skilled, being well trained and using well spoken words; this is good luck."
|
Previous
Index
Next
Threaded
Edit
Reply
Quote
